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Vintage Roz (season 1)

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Vintage Roz
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Season 2

Season 1 of Vintage Roz contains 22 episode ideas.

Characters

Episode list

Title Season # Series #
"Time of the Season" 1 1

Roz grows miserable as her seventieth birthday approaches. Bulldog decides to cheer her up by throwing her a party and inviting some of their old friends. Among the attendees are neighbours Angela and Kevin Porter: young newlyweds who developed a friendship with Roz and Bulldog due to their cynical outlook on marriage. The party is a success, and Roz manages to accept her "distinguished" status. However, she and Bulldog are surprised when Gil Chesterton, having left Seattle, secures a place in Bloomer's exclusive retirement community, Shady Glades, which undoes Bulldog's work when Roz becomes miserable over how stereotypically old she and her friends have become. Unfortunately, Bulldog misinterprets Roz's feelings as the desire to get a place of her own in Shady Glades. He turns to Kevin, Bloomer's district attorney, to persuade the owners into giving Roz a place. Angela, the manager at WKZT, the radio station Roz and Bulldog own, encourages the on-air personalities to endorse Shady Glades. Roz is horrified at what appears to be her friends conspiring to have her committed and makes one last desperate attempt to prove her youth before the men in white coats arrive.

"Radio Bug" 2 2

Angela struggles to deal with Debbie Simmons, an irritatingly perky, brown-nosed agony aunt who is secretly fuming over Roz's decision to hire someone else as station manager. Roz offers Angela some friendly advice but fails to see that she wants to be independent and do things her own way. Kevin intervenes and asks her to let Angela deal with the situation by herself, and Roz reluctantly agrees. Angela re-thinks her decision to go it alone when Debbie manages to stage a strike with several other employees who also feel unappreciated, forcing Roz and Bulldog to step into their old roles at the station. Angela's management issues escalate when Bulldog gets the radio bug again and refuses to hand over the sports show to someone else. Meanwhile, Gil gets a column in the Bloomer Times and accidentally angers one of the Shady Glades residents, whose son owns the restaurant he critically slaughtered.

"Bulldog and the Bistro" 3 3

Bulldog begins to get bored without a job, so he attempts to convince Kevin to co-invest with him Bloomer's local bistro, Café Blossom. Bulldog quickly becomes enamoured with business endeavours and Roz is horrified when he starts using their retirement funds to build up his business empire in Bloomer. When Bulldog's enterprises suddenly crumble, Roz worries he will sell his half of WKZT to pay off his loans, and tries to convince Debbie to hire him as her show's producer. Debbie agrees, under the condition that she receives the same management perks as Angela. Kevin is annoyed when he is forced to handle Café Blossom alone, and he is surprised when Gil offers to back him financially in exchange for a permanently reserved table to write his reviews on. Kevin gets more than he bargained for when Gil first writes a scathing review of Blossom's latest menu change, which has a dramatic impact on profits. Meanwhile, Angela nervously awaits a visit from her critical mother-in-law.

"Dinner Most Deadly" 4 4

When the restaurant and arts critic unexpectedly quits WKZT, Roz and Angela conspire to butter Gil up in an attempt to make him come out of retirement and takeover the show. They plan a dinner containing all of his favorite delicacies, and send an invitation to Shady Glades. When the evening arrives, Roz begins to get suspicious of what happened to Debra, Gil's wife, when she realises that the invitation extended to a guest of his choice. Gil admits that Debra stayed behind in Seattle, but Roz still feels something about it is odd and decides to phone her apartment. However, when she realises the line is disconnected, Roz becomes convinced that Gil murdered Debra to claim her life insurance so he could afford his place in Shady Glades. As Roz desperately tries to get this confession out of Gil, her attempts to butter him up prove to be a disaster. To make matters worse, Angela and Kevin are arguing when Kevin acts cold because he was only told about the dinner at the last minute. Meanwhile, Debbie is annoyed when Bulldog keeps butting in with advice during her show as the callers seem to respond better to him.

"Framing for Apples" 5 5

Roz and Bulldog are delighted when their son, Stuart, pays a visit to Bloomer until he reveals that it is a brief stop-over before he leaves and joins the army. Roz's OTT maternal instincts kick in, and she becomes determined not to let him go. Realising that Bulldog can't help her, Roz turns to Debbie for her manipulative skills, and they concoct a plan to get Stuart detained in Bloomer somehow. Their scheme results in Stuart getting blamed for stealing a bag of apples from the local grocery store, and Kevin is assigned to determine his punishment. Roz and Debbie get more than they bargained for when Stuart gets sentenced to two weeks of community service, which means he'll be expelled from the army for not showing. When Roz realises how upset this has made him, she becomes determined to right her wrongdoing and must convince the cranky grocery store owner, Angus Kane, to drop the charges against Stuart. Meanwhile, Angela must settle a dispute between Gil and a rival critic when they both want exclusive rights to the review of a new restaurant opening in Bloomer.

"Mobsters, Inc." 6 6

Bulldog and Kevin are frightful that Café Blossom is becoming the number one spot for mobsters to conduct their business when a man comes in acting like something out of The Godfather. Desperate not to let this happen, Bulldog and Kevin head to Bloomer's police station and try to convince the officers to abandon the local burger joint and unwind at Blossom instead. The owner of the burger joint is not too happy with this, and café warfare breaks out. Meanwhile, Angela's bid to boost employee morale at the station has resulted in theme days, starting with Mafia Wednesday. Roz is shocked to learn someone has been spreading rumours that Bulldog is an actual don and her efforts to seek out the perpetrator are gravely misinterpreted.

"Bloomer Hell" 7 7

It's Halloween in Bloomer, and Bulldog becomes determined to protect his house from the onslaught of nasty trick-or-treaters. However, Roz welcomes the children of the neighbourhood and hopes to make it the best Halloween ever for them. Roz and Bulldog wind up battling it out for victory when she wants to create a Hell House for the kids to enjoy; while he ups the security measures and makes the scariest threat of them all; juvenile hall. Roz begins to wonder why Bulldog is so against Halloween and tries to convince him to open up about an incident from his childhood. It isn't until Bulldog catches himself yelling "kids, get off the lawn" that he realises his hatred of Halloween has turned him into a bitter old man, and Roz, feeling sorry, rallies her friends to help restore Bulldog's childhood innocence. Meanwhile, Gil critically condemns the Halloween-themed food at Kane Groceries, making him the target of the shopkeeper's army of hungry grandchildren.

"The Old and the Bountiful" 8 8

With the new year approaching, Roz worries WKZT will not have enough funding to continue and decides to appeal to a local business entrepreneur. When Roz gets called out of town for her granddaughter's appendectomy, she leaves Angela and Bulldog to meet with the man and discuss terms. He agrees to back the station financially, but Angela and Bulldog are shocked when they realise he is only doing it because he thinks Roz is a "sweet, old-fashioned grandmother", and that it will help his public image. Worried they will lose the funding, Angela and Bulldog must convince Roz to act like the stereotypical old woman upon her return; something which she isn't happy about at all. Meanwhile, Gil and Debbie are surprised to learn that they are both entitled to request an assistant, so they start interviewing candidates together. Unfortunately, they wind up fighting over the only competent assistant, and when Roz reveals that the station can only afford to hire one person, war breaks out. Kevin intervenes and accidentally prolongs the argument when the assistant requests to work with him instead.

"Rebel Without a Claus" 9 9

Angela volunteers WKZT to organise the Christmas decorations in Bloomer's town square. Bulldog signs up to play the town Santa, but winds up making the whole town turn against his family when he realises that the honor traditionally belongs to Frank Winters, a beloved 87-year old man who is on his way out. Worried that the Briscoes will forever be doomed to hatred and ridicule, Bulldog tries to convince Frank to take up his post, but it soon becomes apparent that he isn't entirely competent, and that the townspeople are in denial over his frame of mind. On Christmas Eve, Angela is shocked to learn that the decorations have been vandalised and she enlists the help of Gil and Kevin to find the culprit. Their investigations lead them to the town hall, where they stumble upon the meeting of what appears to be a cult lead by Debbie. Angela and Gil take their findings to Roz, and they realise that Debbie and several other members of the community belong to a secret organisation that makes it their duty to preserve old traditions in Bloomer – by any means necessary. With Bulldog playing Santa and Angela's unapproved choice in decoration, Roz realises she has already angered the organisation, and that the worst is yet to come in what is quickly turning into a very un-merry Christmas.

"Run for Your Wife" 10 10

The people of Bloomer are shocked when the town selectman announces he is stepping down. Kevin decides to sign up as his replacement and enters his name for candidacy. However, he begins to regret it when Angela gets dollar signs in her eyes and starts acting like the spoilt "first lady" of Bloomer. Kevin realises he doesn't want to sacrifice Angela's integrity for the sake of a job and asks Gil to oppose him in the race, so he doesn't have to quit. Unfortunately, Gil proves to be an incredibly loathsome candidate, despite Kevin's efforts to come across as the worst human being imaginable. Meanwhile, Debbie takes Bulldog on as her bodyguard after giving some bad advice on her agony aunt show, and quickly finds that her sanity is at the most risk with him under her employment.

"The Show Where Noel Shows Up" 11 11

Roz and Bulldog are shocked when Noel Shempsky shows up in Bloomer after having a spat with his wife, Bonnie. It seems he has abandoned all hopes of a reconciliation, and is now lobbying for a place in Shady Glades. Gil discovers that his tenancy agreement is up in a few weeks, and worries that Noel will get his apartment when it transpires that the owner of Shady Glades is a massive Star Trek enthusiast. Determined to keep his place, Gil tries to settle the dispute between Noel and Bonnie, and is surprised to learn that it broke out when Noel's Star Trek memorabilia collection overflowed from their garage into the lounge. Noel reluctantly admits he needs to get rid of some of it, but he doesn't want to give it to "just anyone". Gil and Noel must now convince the owner of Shady Glades to purchase this hefty collection, and they run afoul of Kevin and Angela when he decides to store it all in the apartment that was reserved for Kevin's aging mother. Meanwhile, Roz accidentally interrupts Debbie's show whilst looking for a place to hide from Noel.

"Paint the Town Green" 12 12

The citizens of Bloomer are intrigued when a young boy claims the bench in the town square and starts painting every day. Kevin, an art enthusiast, befriends the boy, whose name is Craig. Craig reveals he is painting everything he sees in Bloomer, as his late mother says that the best art comes from real life. Kevin, impressed by Craig's work, offers to sponsor his art and organise a gallery viewing. However, he is later driven crazy by something he briefly saw on Craig's latest work, which leads him to believe that Angela is having an affair with the milkman. Kevin becomes determined to see the art piece again, which compromises his budding business relationship with Craig. Meanwhile, at town hall, Roz debates the issue of Craig invading people's privacy, Bulldog and Debbie find mutual interest in causing civil unrest and Gil is shocked when he learns the residents of Shady Glades are not allowed to attend town meetings.

"A Chance of Showers" 13 13

Roz and Angela are surprised when an anonymous survey passed around the station reveals that several employees don't feel they are given enough support during difficult times in their lives. Determined to fix this, Roz and Angela decide to plan a surprise baby shower for a pregnant and seemingly depressed accountant. However, their efforts are a disaster when it turns out that the woman isn't pregnant, but overweight. At the end of the day, Roz and Angela are horrified at the extent of their misunderstanding when the offended employee brings in an attorney to sue the station. Meanwhile, Bulldog and Gil face up to the task of distributing all the unwanted baby shower gifts, but quickly find they can put them to alternative use benefiting themselves, much to Debbie's dismay.

"Retirement Home Alone" 14 14

While putting his documents in order, Gil is shocked to realise that Bobby, a loveable young man who frequently visits Shady Glades, is the son of his former mentor, Elias Marlin. However, Gil's horror intensifies when he realises that Bobby has been raised to believe that Horatio Marlin, Elias' brother, is his father, and has been visiting him for the last few years under these pretences. Gil becomes determined to set things straight and invites Bobby back to the home for the following Saturday under the guise of a father-son dinner party. When Bobby doesn't show up, Gil becomes convinced of a retirement home conspiracy and desperately tries to get the message to Bobby. Unfortunately, his efforts get hindered by a tyrannical Nurse Ratched-esque dictator. Meanwhile, despite being at the appropriate age, Roz must combat her fear of retirement homes when Gil phones her for assistance.

"The Agony Aunt of Defeat" 15 15

Debbie is outraged when Libby, an insufferable prima donna who is like her in a lot of ways, is hired to do the agony aunt show on weekends. Worried that the listeners will prefer Libby and that she'll ultimately get sacked, Debbie demands she joins her on the show, to which Angela reluctantly accepts. Debbie and Libby's conflicts bring in ratings like the station's never seen before; however, when they start finding shared interests, their conflicts decrease, as do the ratings, and Angela realises she'll have to drive a wedge between them in order to continue the station's unprecedented success. Debbie and Libby quickly understand what Angela is up to and set out to teach her a lesson by humiliating her live on the air. Angela's plan just may succeed when a patron at Café Blossom inexplicably recognises Libby for the show, and not Debbie. Meanwhile, Bulldog and Kevin argue when Bulldog insinuates that Kevin is unable to get his hands dirty and accomplish the practical aspects of running a coffeehouse. Kevin decides to prove Bulldog wrong by working as a waiter, and finds that his only difficulty lies with Gil, the fussiest patron Café Blossom's ever had.

"Army Games" 16 16

Roz and Bulldog are shocked when Stuart shows up in the middle of the night, having gone A.W.O.L. from his army training. Stuart reveals he has just broken up with his girlfriend, and he needs somewhere to crash for a few weeks to recuperate. Roz reluctantly agrees, but she has trouble keeping it a secret when two army representatives show up at the station looking for Stuart. When they don't get any answers, they start advertising for recruits and Bulldog, Gil and Kevin are drafted into participating in their "army games". Gil and Kevin are surprised when Bulldog demonstrates a significant amount of knowledge about army regulations, and Bulldog realises it is because of his e-mail correspondence with Stuart over the last few months. Unfortunately, the representatives find his knowledge suspicious and Bulldog's poor ability to keep a straight face while lying threatens to blow the whistle on everything. Meanwhile, Angela and Debbie become determined to build up a women's team so they can participate in the gender-divided army games.

"Fear and Loathing in Bloomer" 17 17

Gil is annoyed when several incorrect groceries are delivered to his apartment from Kane's, so he marches over to the supermarket with the faulty products and demands a refund. However, a poorly placed banana concealed by his jacket results in the owner, Angus, thinking it is a robbery attempt. Angus hands over the money from the cash register, and Gil leaves, believing he has simply acquired his refund. The rest of the town is left thinking Gil is a criminal mastermind, and local law enforcement is called in to investigate the "crime". Angus is told that without any evidence, no arrests can be made. The residents, including Roz, Bulldog, Kevin, Angela and Debbie, gather at a town meeting and discuss what can be done about Gil. Roz and Bulldog struggle to accept that their oldest friend could be a criminal; and there are gasps when Debbie suggests that Gil simply could've lost his marbles. Gil, on the other hand, is surprised when he realises how much money he has been given, so the next day, he heads back to Kane's with the intention of returning it. Unfortunately, Angus is prepared this time and uses an electric taser on Gil. At the hospital, Roz and Bulldog realise the misunderstanding and set out to prove Gil's innocence before the evidence is gathered.

"When You Were Old" 18 18

Bulldog is horrified when he wakes up one morning with severe back pain, and he worries that he has truly become old when Roz suggests he visits a chiropractic doctor. At the doctor's, he meets Samuel Phillips, a man who is older than he is but acts like a vigorous teenager. Bulldog becomes determined to learn Samuel's secret and enlists the help of Kevin to investigate. Their snooping leads them to the Bloomer Community Centre, where an O.A.P. meeting is taking place. Bulldog and Kevin are shocked to discover that Samuel and the old people of Bloomer are involved in a drug-dealing organisation as the pot helps them through their aches and pains to feel youthful again. Bulldog and Kevin become determined to do something about this, but are unaware that they don't share the same intentions; Bulldog wants to acquire some pot for his back pain; while Kevin is determined to dismantle the organisation as he doesn't want his children growing up in a drug-filled environment. Meanwhile, Gil learns that his neighbour, Arnold, is a drug mule for the organisation, so he tries to convince him to sneak in the food that is banned at Shady Glades.

"My Brothel's Keeper" 19 19

Town selectman Angus Kane announces during a meeting that a small museum devoted to the history of Bloomer will be opening shortly, and Roz is excited to learn more about the place where she grew up. However, she is shocked to discover that the radio station was once a brothel, and she becomes determined to stop Angus from revealing this in the museum, fearing a decrease in viewers and family-friendly sponsors. When Angus refuses, Roz enlists the help of Debbie to dig up dirt on him, and they come to believe that he belongs to a family of mobsters in Italy. When Angus starts interviewing for well-dressed tour guides, the rumours can only get worse. Meanwhile, Angela and Kevin get into an escalating argument over who knows more about the town; and Gil and Bulldog regret applying for the tour guide positions when they realise they know nothing about it.

"Fire at Shady Glades" 20 20

The citizens of Bloomer are shocked when Shady Glades goes up in flames in the middle of the night; fortunately no one is hurt. However, Roz and Bulldog are unprepared for the consequences when they discover a surprising clause in the town charter, stipulating that, in the event of a large fire, residents of Bloomer must house a few of the victims. Their horror intensifies when they realise Gil has been "assigned" to their home, due to their history with him and the fact that no one else in town is willing to put up with his fussiness. Within a few days, Gil is already driving Roz and Bulldog crazy, to the point where Roz decides to conduct a fire investigation of her own, with Angela and Debbie. Though their efforts prove fruitless, things look up when Debbie discovers a business card on a trail leading away from Shady Glades. Roz is stunned by the name on the card: "Bebe Glazer", and re-calling the devil-like woman's past history with fire, she realises they have found the culprit. When it becomes apparent that the owner of Shady Glades went missing following the fire, Roz and the girls come to the conclusion that something far more sinister is going on, and she is forced to think like Bebe in order to prove it. Meanwhile, Bulldog seeks refuge from Gil at Café Blossom, much to Kevin's annoyance.

"Back Out of the Closet" 21 21

Bulldog accidentally throws his back out while yelling at the television, and he becomes determined to hide it from Roz after mocking her fear of ageing the previous night. Enlisting the help of Gil, he desperately tries to go about his usual duties in town so Roz doesn't get suspicious. When they stop off at a park, Gil places Bulldog on a bench so they can rest. Unfortunately, gossip queen Debbie happens to be several feet away, and she completely misinterprets the situation after witnessing Bulldog and Gil in a seemingly compromising position. As a result, the whole town is left thinking Bulldog has jilted Roz for Gil and even Roz begins to have her suspicions when Bulldog doesn't try it on with her in bed for the first time in years. Meanwhile, Kevin tries to convince Angus to give a young offender a job at his grocery store, and feels guilty when several products start disappearing. Then, Angela says something that makes him convinced that she has developed kleptomania.

"This Land is Our Land" 22 22

It's time for Bloomer's annual "Charity-a-thon", and when Roz volunteers to participate at a town meeting, she is shocked to learn that the residents don't consider her or Bulldog a member of the community as they haven't done anything charitable since their arrival. Determined to remedy this, Roz swears to do the most amount of charitable things in the event. However, she soon finds that Debbie, the long-running winner, is her biggest competitor. Meanwhile, Kevin is informed by a source in Washington that several land developers plan on buying out Bloomer and demolishing it to make way for a massive business park. Kevin reveals this startling information in a town meeting, and the townspeople realise they'll have to "do charity work like they've never done charity work before" so they can use the money themselves and save their town. Unfortunately, personal greed quickly corrupts the minds of several people, including Gil, who is determined to own the newly renovated Shady Glades. Angela is surprised when Kevin suggests they give up and move to Washington, resulting in a massive argument over marital support. Kevin, feeling Angela has never been supportive of his career, leaves and tells her he'll call from Washington. Roz, appalled by the diminished community spirit, realises she must "rally the troops" in order to save Bloomer, but can't help fantasising over how much better her life with Bulldog would be if they took the nifty severance package offered by the land developers.

Episodes (Season 1 • 2 • 3 • 4 • 5 • 6 • 7 • 8 • 9 • 10 • 11 12 • 13 • 14 • 15)

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